Series: Fully Alive - A Study of Ephesians
Sermon Recap
Ephesians 4:1–16 calls us to live in a way
that reflects the calling we have received in Christ. This means walking in
humility, guarding unity, and using the gifts God has given us to build up the
church. We are not saved to sit on the sidelines, but to grow into maturity and
help others do the same. When each person plays their part, the body of Christ
becomes stronger, more unified, and a clearer picture of Jesus to the world.
Ephesians 4:1-16
Unity in the Body of Christ
[1] I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord,
urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been
called, [2] with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one
another in love, [3] eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of
peace. [4] There is one body and one Spirit — just as you were called to the
one hope that belongs to your call — [5] one Lord, one faith, one baptism, [6]
one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. [7] But
grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of Christ’s gift.
[8] Therefore it says, “When He ascended on high He led a host of captives, and
He gave gifts to men.’ [9] (In saying, “He ascended,” what does it mean but
that he had also descended into the lower regions, the earth? [10] He who
descended is the one who also ascended far above all the heavens, that he might
fill all things.) [11] And He gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists,
the shepherds and teachers, [12] to equip the saints for the work of ministry,
for building up the body of Christ, [13] until we all attain to the unity of
the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the
measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, [14] so that we may no longer
be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of
doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. [15] Rather,
speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into Him who is the
head, into Christ, [16] from whom the whole body, joined and held together by
every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly,
makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love. (ESV)
The
Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001
by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Ephesians
4:1-16.
Closing Thoughts
Ephesians 4 shows us that when the body of
Christ is healthy (marked by humility, love, and truth) it reflects Jesus in a
powerful way. As a group, this means we commit to protecting unity, using our
gifts to serve one another, and helping each other grow in Christ. We don’t
compete or compare; we contribute. And as each person plays their part, the
group becomes a place where people are equipped, encouraged, and sent out to
live on mission, showing the world what it looks like to follow Jesus together.
END
Teacher Notes:
Faith That Shows Up in Relationships
Ephesians 4:1–16
Why is the marriage relationship such an
important example for all other relationships - especially the church?
The marriage relationship is such an
important example because it is one of the clearest places where people learn
what it truly means to live in lasting unity with another person.
In marriage, two different people — with
different personalities, habits, expectations, and weaknesses — must learn to:
- love consistently
- forgive repeatedly
- communicate
honestly
- sacrifice
selfishness
- grow through
difficulty
- remain
committed over time
And those are the exact kinds of relational
qualities Paul the Apostle emphasizes in Ephesians 4 when describing life in
the church.
Marriage exposes something very quickly, and
that is Unity is not maintained by feelings alone. It requires humility, patience,
grace, endurance and truth spoken in love. Without those things, relationships will
slowly fracture.
That’s why marriage becomes such a meaningful
illustration for the church — because the church is also made up of imperfect
people learning how to live together in love.
Paul describes the church as one body - joined
together - growing together – and building itself up in love. That language is
deeply relational. The church is not simply an organization that shares
beliefs. It is a community of people learning to live under Christ together.
And marriage provides one of the clearest human pictures of:
- commitment over convenience
- unity without
sameness
- growth through
struggle
- love that
matures with time
In Ephesians 4, Paul says believers must:
- bear with one another
- preserve unity
- speak truth in
love
- grow into
maturity together
Those same principles are essential in marriage.
Later in Ephesians (chapter 5), Paul actually
connects marriage directly to Christ and the church.
Marriage is such a powerful example because
it teaches two people how to grow together in humility, patience, forgiveness,
and love — and those are the same qualities Paul says are necessary for unity
in the church.
Ephesians 4:1-3
I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge
you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called,
with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in
love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
Which of these — humility, gentleness,
patience, or bearing with others — do you think is most needed in church
relationships today?
What does it look like in real life to “bear
with one another in love” when someone is difficult?
Sometimes it means:
- listening when someone repeats themselves
- showing kindness when a person is short-tempered
- refusing to respond harshly in the heat of frustration
Not because the behavior is easy…but because
love chooses restraint.
Sometimes it means: Seeing the Person Beyond the Problem
Difficult people often carry wounds, fears,
loneliness, grief, and habits formed over years.
Bearing with someone means refusing to reduce
them to their most frustrating trait.
It always should mean: Remembering How Patient God Has Been with Us
One of the deepest motivations for patience
with others is remembering God’s patience toward us.
We all fail, struggle, require forgiveness
repeatedly, and yet God continues loving us faithfully. That changes how we
respond to difficult people.
Bearing with one another in love means
choosing patience, grace, and commitment even when relationships become
difficult.
Ephesians 4:4-10
There is one body and one Spirit — just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call — one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. But grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of Christ’s gift. Therefore, it says, “When He ascended on high, He led a host of captives, and He gave gifts to men.’ (In saying, “He ascended,” what does it mean but that he had also descended into the lower regions, the earth? He who descended is the one who also ascended far above all the heavens, that He might fill all things.)
This unity is not something we create — it already exists because of Christ. But it is something we are called to protect.
How can we actively “guard” unity in the church rather than unintentionally harm it?
We Choose Humility Over Pride
Most division begins when:
- people must have the last word
- preferences become demands
- being right matters more than relationships
Humility says, “I may not always see
everything clearly.” It leaves room for grace and understanding.
We Refuse Gossip and Careless Speech
Few things damage unity faster than words.
Churches are often harmed more by whispered
criticism, assumptions, sarcasm, and unresolved resentment than by major
doctrinal disagreements.
That’s why Paul later says, “Let no
corrupting talk come out of your mouths…”
Guarding unity means asking Does this
conversation heal or divide?
Am I building someone up or tearing them
down?
We Remember What We Share
Paul reminds believers we share one Lord - one faith - one body – and one Spirit. That means our spiritual connection is deeper than personalities, politics, preferences, and generations.
Unity grows when we focus more on what unites
us in Christ than what separates us personally.
We Value People More Than Preferences
Sometimes unity is harmed when:
- traditions become more important than people
- opinions become more important than love
- Mature believers learn not every preference is worth division.
We Pray for One Another
It is difficult to stay bitter toward people
we consistently pray for.
Prayer softens pride, frustration, resentment,
and reminds us we are all dependent on God’s grace.
One reason George McLintock quickly defended
his wife is because he understood something important - relationships are
damaged when people stop protecting one another’s dignity.
That’s also true in the church.
Unity is guarded when believers:
- protect rather than attack
- restore rather than shame
- build up rather than tear down
We guard unity when we choose humility,
careful words, forgiveness, and love over pride, criticism, and division.
Guarding Unity Requires Intention
- Choosing peace over being right
- Listening before reacting
- Extending patience when it’s undeserved
Unity doesn’t mean we always agree — but it does mean we choose love as the higher priority.
Ephesians 4:11-16
And He gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into Him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.
What does it look like to “speak the truth in
love” in real, everyday situations?
It means: Correcting Without Condemning
Instead of embarrassing or attacking someone,
you speak honestly with gentleness and respect.
For example:
- A parent guiding an adult child without shaming them
- A friend expressing concern without sounding superior
- A church member addressing an issue privately rather than gossiping publicly
Truth says:
This needs to be addressed.
Love says:
I care about you while I address it.
It means: Refusing Gossip
Sometimes “speaking the truth in love” means
refusing to join negative conversations about others.
Instead of:
- exaggerating faults
- tearing someone down
- speaking carelessly
You choose words that are honest but still
protect dignity.
It means: Being Honest Instead of Avoiding
Love is not pretending problems do not exist. Sometimes speaking truth in love means having difficult conversations:
- apologizing sincerely
- confronting harmful behavior
- admitting hurt honestly
- setting healthy boundaries graciously
Real love does not avoid truth. It handles
truth carefully.
It means: Choosing Tone as Well as Words
Two people can say the exact same truth:
- one heals
- the other wounds
Speaking truth in love means:
- timing matters
- tone matters
- attitude matters
Paul’s words about humility, gentleness, and patience - all shape how truth should be spoken.
Speaking the truth in love means caring more
about helping someone grow than simply proving yourself right.
In the movie clip, John Wayne speaks wisdom
into the life of his daughter – because he loves her and wants her to mature.
He says, “Because all the gold in the United
States Treasury, and all the harp music in heaven can’t equal what happens
between a man and a woman and all that growing together.”
This is exactly the kind of influence Paul is
talking about…
Helping one another grow and mature.
So, this week be thinking about…
Who in your life could be strengthened by
what God has taught you?
The real measure of our faith isn’t just what
we know…but how we live with the people God has placed around us: in our homes,
in our families, and in our church.
A life that is truly ‘worthy of the
calling’…is a life where faith shows up in relationships.
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