Hey Gang,
We are continuing in our series on ways believers are to relate to one another. The world teaches us to always look out for number one, why, because we live in a selfish world. But the Bible teaches something completely different, it says that the Christian life involves how we relate to one another and the fulfillment of certain reciprocal responsibilities. Many of these responsibilities are found in the "one another" commands of the New Testament - the first was to Love One Another, the second was to Forgive One Another and this week we are told Don't Criticize One Another.
We are continuing in our series on ways believers are to relate to one another. The world teaches us to always look out for number one, why, because we live in a selfish world. But the Bible teaches something completely different, it says that the Christian life involves how we relate to one another and the fulfillment of certain reciprocal responsibilities. Many of these responsibilities are found in the "one another" commands of the New Testament - the first was to Love One Another, the second was to Forgive One Another and this week we are told Don't Criticize One Another.
What is something you wish you could hear from the person it would mean the most hearing it from?
Think about it: ___________
The “words” we choose to use to communicate is one of the most important aspects of learning to relate to one another in love. The Bible tells us that what is in our hearts will come out through our words.
When a person is unconscious, we listen first for their breathing. We wait for their eyes to open; then we listen for what? Words, we listen for them to speak, why? Because words can mean life!
When you want to tell your spouse how much you love them, does it matter what words you use?
When you want to comfort someone, does it matter what and how you choose your words?
When you want to correct someone, family, friend or not, does it matter how you say what you say?
Do you ever find yourself thinking any of these thoughts?
1. I am way too critical in my attitudes and speech.
2. I know gossip is wrong, but I get caught up in it anyway.
3. I tend to get impatient with other Christians who don’t have their act together.
4. Sometimes it’s easier to criticize than to encourage.
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When you want to tell your spouse how much you love them, does it matter what words you use?
When you want to comfort someone, does it matter what and how you choose your words?
When you want to correct someone, family, friend or not, does it matter how you say what you say?
POWER OF WORDS! - MOTIVE - POWER OF RESULT!
Do you ever find yourself thinking any of these thoughts?
1. I am way too critical in my attitudes and speech.
2. I know gossip is wrong, but I get caught up in it anyway.
3. I tend to get impatient with other Christians who don’t have their act together.
4. Sometimes it’s easier to criticize than to encourage.
Don't we respect some people for being able to criticize constructively?
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In our lesson this morning, James is addressing people that criticized one another and Paul addressed people that argued and complained over "doubtful issues."
I. THE PROBLEM WITH CRITICISM – JAMES 4:11-12
Don't criticize one another, brothers. He who criticizes a brother or judges his brother criticizes the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. There is one lawgiver and judge who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?
Name ways that we exchange words today to one another.
- Face-to-face, telephone, cell phone, email, twitter, Facebook, instant messaging...
Why do people criticize others?
- Low self esteem, way they were raised, jealousy, projection of the way they are themselves.
What is the problem with criticism? What is the dangerous progression we engage in when we choose to criticize others?
- We become a judge over another.
- When we criticize another, we criticize the law - Jesus summarized the law by saying that we are to love God and love others. Paul would later say in Romans that when we love others, we satisfy the whole law. When we fail to love others we breaks God's law.
Does the command to not criticize and judge mean we can’t say an action is wrong? How can we exercise good judgment without being judgmental?
- The command refers to an attitude that looks for faults and says unkind things about others. It is not referring to exercising discernment.
In what ways are we to love someone whose behavior offends us?
- We can be merciful. James 2:3
- We can pray.
- We can find a practical way to serve or bless the person.
- We can avoid criticism.
Our role is not to judge, only God can and does accomplish this.
II. THE NEED FOR ACCEPTANCE – ROMANS 14:1-4
Accept anyone who is weak in faith, but don't argue about doubtful issues. One person believes he may eat anything, but one who is weak eats only vegetables. One who eats must not look down on one who does not eat; and one who does not eat must not criticize one who does, because God has accepted him. Who are you to criticize another's household slave? Before his own Lord he stands or falls. And stand he will! For the Lord is able to make him stand.
In the Roman church, the doubtful issue was eating meat. We would probably consider it silly to be at a Roman church potluck and hear them criticizing one another for what they ate.
What are the doubtful issues we face today in the church? Would any of these seem silly to others?
- Dancing, movies we go see, drinking or not.
How has your stance on doubtful issues changed as you’ve matured? Do you feel you have become more or less accepting of people? More or less able to identify what’s worth focusing on? Why?
Acceptance includes affirming the legitimate faith in Christ that each one has professed and sharing in fellowship with them. Paul says that we are neither to ridicule nor condemn another over doubtful issues. The Lord will deal with His own servants in the way He sees fit.
III. THE GOAL OF EDIFICATION – ROMANS 14:5-12, 19
One person considers one day to be above another day. Someone else considers every day to be the same. Each one must be fully convinced in his own mind. Whoever observes the day, observes it to the Lord. Whoever eats, eats to the Lord, since he gives thanks to God; and whoever does not eat, it is to the Lord that he does not eat, yet he thanks God. For none of us lives to himself, and no one dies to himself. If we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. Christ died and came to life for this: that He might rule over both the dead and the living. But you, why do you criticize your brother? Or you, why do you look down on your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God. For it is written: As I live, says the Lord, every knee will bow to Me, and every tongue will give praise to God. So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God.
So then, we must pursue what promotes peace and what builds up one another.
Does it matter whether I worship on Saturday or Sunday?
Does it matter how I worship, when I worship?
What activities other than worship are appropriate? Are sports, yard work, and shopping permissible?
Is Paul saying we should let our conscience be our guide? Is an action okay because we’re convinced it’s okay?
What did Paul want believers to do regardless of their stance on doubtful issues?
YOUR GOAL THIS WEEK:
Our goal this week should be to let our words constantly reflect God’s love for us and our love for God as we love all the people with whom we come into contact.
Choose one of the following five kinds of loving communication to focus on during the coming week.
1. Kind … Words: Transform worry to joy.
2. Gentle … Words: Break through anger.
3. Pleasant … Words: Encourage learning.
4. Honest … Words: Make us feel loved.
5. Wise … Words: Heal broken hearts.
Emily Dickinson once said, "Words are my life!"
When you speak, when you relate to one another - do it in love!
Acceptance includes affirming the legitimate faith in Christ that each one has professed and sharing in fellowship with them. Paul says that we are neither to ridicule nor condemn another over doubtful issues. The Lord will deal with His own servants in the way He sees fit.
III. THE GOAL OF EDIFICATION – ROMANS 14:5-12, 19
One person considers one day to be above another day. Someone else considers every day to be the same. Each one must be fully convinced in his own mind. Whoever observes the day, observes it to the Lord. Whoever eats, eats to the Lord, since he gives thanks to God; and whoever does not eat, it is to the Lord that he does not eat, yet he thanks God. For none of us lives to himself, and no one dies to himself. If we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. Christ died and came to life for this: that He might rule over both the dead and the living. But you, why do you criticize your brother? Or you, why do you look down on your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God. For it is written: As I live, says the Lord, every knee will bow to Me, and every tongue will give praise to God. So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God.
So then, we must pursue what promotes peace and what builds up one another.
Does it matter whether I worship on Saturday or Sunday?
- Paul is discussing the command to honor the Sabbath Day and keep it Holy.
Does it matter how I worship, when I worship?
What activities other than worship are appropriate? Are sports, yard work, and shopping permissible?
- Paul's advice was that such matters should be decided between the believer and His Lord. It is a matter of motive and the believer showing devotion to the Lord.
- The Baptist Faith and Message states that "activities on the Lord's Day should be commensurate with the Christian's conscience under the Lordship of Jesus Christ."
- Don't argue over doubtful issues.
Is Paul saying we should let our conscience be our guide? Is an action okay because we’re convinced it’s okay?
- Let your conscience be guided by the Holy Spirit.
What did Paul want believers to do regardless of their stance on doubtful issues?
- Promote peace and build one another up.
YOUR GOAL THIS WEEK:
Our goal this week should be to let our words constantly reflect God’s love for us and our love for God as we love all the people with whom we come into contact.
Choose one of the following five kinds of loving communication to focus on during the coming week.
1. Kind … Words: Transform worry to joy.
2. Gentle … Words: Break through anger.
3. Pleasant … Words: Encourage learning.
4. Honest … Words: Make us feel loved.
5. Wise … Words: Heal broken hearts.
Emily Dickinson once said, "Words are my life!"
When you speak, when you relate to one another - do it in love!
Prayer of Commitment
Lord, help me to speak Your truth in love. Amen
I hope everyone has had a blessed week as we continue in our study of how we are to relate to one another.
See you on Sunday!
In His Love,
David & Susan
