Click on the ZOOM link you were sent to join us!
Sunday @ 6:00 PM
Sunday @ 6:00 PM
DEALING WITH MESSY RELATIONSHIPS
In this series, we are looking at six traits God calls us to exhibit, traits that can clean up and restore a messy relationship. Living a life infused with these traits can even prevent a relationship from getting messy in the first place.
Love /
Encourage / Forgive / Serve / Yield / Accept
Let's continue with the fourth trait to SERVE.
THE
BIBLE MEETS LIFE
We’ve
all had experiences with customer service we’d like to forget. But I tend to
remember the ones that make me smile rather than frown.
For
example, a man booked a last-minute trip on a well-known airline to see his dying
grandson one last time. Traffic and long lines at the airport caused him to
arrive at the gate twelve minutes after the plane’s scheduled departure, but
the airline had been informed of this man’s tragic situation. Imagine the man’s
surprise when the pilot himself was standing there waiting for him. The pilot
said, “They can’t go anywhere without me, and I wasn’t going anywhere without you.
Now relax. We’ll get you there. And again, I’m so sorry.”
Good
customer service is not about making a sale or even keeping a customer. It’s about
doing what’s right and helping the other person.
But
we’re not talking about customers and business; we’re talking about relationships.
The principle still applies though: we strengthen our relationships when we
help and serve the other person. Serving is a tangible way to love others.
WHAT
DOES THE BIBLE SAY?
Galatians
5:13-15
13 For
you were called to be free, brothers and sisters; only don’t use this freedom
as an opportunity for the flesh, but serve one another through love. 14 For the
whole law is fulfilled in one statement: Love your neighbor as yourself. 15 But
if you bite and devour one another, watch out, or you will be consumed by one
another.
Freedom
is a natural human hunger. We all want to feel free, but sin so easily entangles
us and holds our feet to the ground. In Galatians 5, however, Paul reminded us
that a revolution has come through Jesus. Because of His perfect sacrifice, the
power of sin has been broken, and we can be free from the downward spiral of
sin.
Let’s
look first at what this freedom is not. Our freedom in Christ is not a license
to go back to our old lifestyles—to live like we did before we were saved.
Notice the word flesh in verse 13. This refers to our sinful nature, the “old person”
that continues to live inside us, even after the moment of salvation. “The
flesh” is the self-absorbed side of us that can grow like a cancer when let off
its leash. It no longer owns us, but it likes to think it does. Paul knew firsthand
about the continual pull of the old sin nature (Rom. 7:14-24).
The
inward focus of the sin nature not only harms us; it affects our relationships.
If I am focused on myself, and you are focused on yourself, how can we ever
have a strong relationship? When we focus inwardly, on ourselves, sins like
selfishness, greed, and uncaring attitudes quickly follow and will sour our
relationship. As Paul warned: “But if you bite and devour one another, watch
out, or you will be consumed by one another” (v. 15).
Paul
also knew that we would find the only remedy for the flesh in an ongoing relationship
with Christ (v. 25). So, as we focus on Christ, we also are to focus on those He
has brought into our lives. We should maximize our liberty in Christ by loving
people through service.
Question
2:
What’s
the connection between freedom in Christ and the command to serve?
Jesus
blazed a trail back to the beauty of community. While the ultimate result of
Christ’s death and resurrection is the forgiveness of sin and a relationship
with God, it also alters the way we feel about ourselves (no more guilt!) . . .
and revolutionizes the way we feel about others. We can now love people, and we
express that love through serving them.
Think
of the ways you naturally serve yourself.
- When your body needs food, you make haste to the fridge.
- When your body calls out for sleep, you go in search of a pillow and blanket.
- When your body feels the need for exercise, you take the dog for a walk.
This
type of “self-service” is not necessarily bad, but Paul challenged us to serve
others just as faithfully as we serve ourselves. We “serve” our needs.
Likewise, we can serve others when they have needs. Make everyday investments
in others until it becomes a habit, the natural way of doing your life.
Galatians
6:1-5
1
Brothers and sisters, if someone is overtaken in any wrongdoing, you who are spiritual,
restore such a person with a gentle spirit, watching out for yourselves so that
you also won’t be tempted. 2 Carry one another’s burdens; in this way you will fulfill
the law of Christ. 3 For if anyone considers himself to be something when he is
nothing, he deceives himself. 4 Let each person examine his own work, and then he
can take pride in himself alone, and not compare himself with someone else. 5
For each person will have to carry his own load.
In
Galatians 6 Paul gave us a more effective way for using our energy and time:
helping others. Paul began by describing a way of helping others that may
surprise you: serve others by confronting them in love. “Brothers and sisters,
if someone is overtaken in any wrongdoing, you who are spiritual, restore such
a person with a gentle spirit” (v. 1).
One of
the most important roles you play in others’ lives is to help them see their
blind spots. Anyone who drives a car can grasp this idea. I have been saved at
the last second by my loving wife shouting: “HONEY, THERE’S A CAR BESIDE YOU!”
In a panic, I yanked the wheel and returned to my lane unscathed.
As my
heart rate slowly returned to normal, I offered thanks to my wife because her
intent really had been to help me and not to throw me into cardiac arrest! Thanks
to her, I had dodged a proverbial bullet.
Question
3:
How
can we help others see blind spots in a way that strengthens relationships?
Paul
challenged the church to gently, lovingly, and sensitively serve others by helping
them see the way they wound themselves or others. This process requires much
prayer, but it must be a part of healthy relationships.
Paul
drove home the need for tangible forms of service:
“Carry
one another’s burdens; in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ” (v. 2).
Strong relationships call for us to help carry loads. It’s a lot easier to move
a heavy piece of furniture when someone is there to help you carry it. It’s
still my load to carry, but by coming alongside and helping me carry it, you ease
my strain. In a sense, my burden becomes your burden as we carry it together.
Notice
it goes both ways. You help carry my burdens, and I help carry yours. This, of
course, requires appropriate self-disclosure and soul-bearing. After all,
people cannot help you lift something they don’t know about.
In
verses 3-5, Paul called me to take a long, hard look in the mirror. Do I have a
healthy view of myself, demonstrated through humble confession and openness to
correction? Do I realize that one day I will stand before Jesus and answer for the
amount of heavy lifting I performed — or didn’t perform — in the lives of
others? I must carry my load of service.
Question
4:
What
does carrying one another’s burdens look like?
Galatians
6:10
10
Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us work for the good of all, especially
for those who belong to the household of faith.
Paul
declared in verse 7: “For whatever a person sows he will also reap.” For this reason,
Christians are challenged to sow seeds in the forever field of Christian community.
In verse 10, Paul mentioned the need to demonstrate love to all, but he
stressed the importance of Christians investing in other Christians.
Relationships inside the church are held at the highest level.
This
certainly doesn’t mean we ignore the needs of those outside the body of Christ.
Sowing
good seed in the lives of lost people is important as well. But just as a
person cares for his immediate family before he takes care of the neighbors (1
Tim. 5:8), believers must be sure to take care of their brothers and sisters in
Christ. This serves as a great witness to those outside the church.
Paul
took it for granted that the Galatian Christians were interacting regularly
with one another. Being with the body of believers is critical to spiritual
growth. It should go without saying: one of the prerequisites for healthy relationships
is your consistent presence in others’ lives. What a challenge it is to serve people
with whom you rarely sit and talk, those with whom you hardly ever engage in robust
conversation. Indeed, for some, the first step of obedience to Galatians 6:10
is to simply to show up more frequently!
Once
you insert yourself regularly into a small group environment, Paul would then
challenge you to resist the urge to merely sit back and soak it up! Do not wait
for the invitation to serve, but search for opportunities to work for the good
in others’ lives. The opportunities to serve are endless.
While
Christians should stand ready to serve in any way they are needed, the wisest
way to serve others is by opening up your unique package of spiritual gifts.
Consider how the Holy Spirit has hardwired you for ministry and use those gifts
and abilities to serve and meet the needs that lie before you. All that remains
for us to do is to open our hearts and eyes to see the needs and opportunities,
and go for it!
Question
5:
What
opportunities does our group have to serve others in our church and community?
SERVING
OTHERS
On the
left side, list ways you’ve appreciated others serving you. On the right side,
list ways you have served or can serve others. Place the name of someone you
can serve this week next to one of the items listed.
How
Others Have Served You How You Have
Served or Can Serve Others
LIVE
IT OUT
Where
is God leading you to serve?
Choose one of the following applications:
- Thank someone. Consider the person who served you, confronted you in love, or helped you carry a burden. Contact him or her and express your appreciation.
- Restore someone. If a friend or family member is in the midst of sinful behavior or has made a bad decision, ask God for wisdom and direction on the best way to lovingly talk with the person. Act on your prayer.
- Serve someone. As a group, identify individuals whom you could walk alongside and help ease their burden. Use this as an opportunity to love and bring them into your group.
Let’s
so live that, when people think of great experiences with service, they don’t
think of customer service; they think of Christian service!
Can't wait to see everyone this Sunday!
In His Love,
David & Susan
Teacher Notes:
Teacher Notes:
Our
Lesson gave us a great story: A man
booked a last-minute trip on a well-known airline to see his dying grandson one
last time. Traffic and long lines at the airport caused him to arrive at the
gate twelve minutes after the plane’s scheduled departure, but the airline had been
informed of this man’s tragic situation. Imagine the man’s surprise when the
pilot himself was standing there waiting for him. The pilot said, “They can’t
go anywhere without me, and I wasn’t going anywhere without you. Now relax.
We’ll get you there. And again, I’m so sorry.”
Wow is
that not about doing what’s right and helping the other person.
This
is what our lesson is about this week – loving others by SERVING.
The
central theme of Galatians is “How is a person saved and justified? By works of
the law, or by faith?”
Almost
everything Paul writes in this book will be to answer those questions.
The
glory of God as the purpose of Salvation. The central theme of Galatians is
'Freedom in Christ' which is understood as the birthright of every believer.
Through faith in Christ, he has been delivered from the bondage and
condemnation of the law and from the power of sin.
Paul's
letter to the Galatians can be divided into three parts. Chapters 1—2 focus on
Paul's biography, including his qualifications to represent Christ as an
apostle. The end of chapter 2, through chapter 4, deals mainly with theology,
explaining that justification comes by faith in Christ and not by following the
works of the law. Chapters 5—6 focus on application of these truths. Knowing
all that's been presented in chapters 1—4, how should those who are free in
Christ live?
Paul
then turns his focus to another way Christians might waste the freedom Christ
has won for us. Some might think that since they have already been forgiven for
their sin and justified by faith in Christ, what would keep them from indulging
in all their sinful desires? That's not what our freedom in Christ is for.
Instead, we should use our freedom to serve each other in love (Galatians
5:13–15).
But
how can we overcome our sinful desires and focus on serving others? We can only
do so by the power of God's Spirit, given to us when we trusted in Christ for
our salvation. The Spirit of God is powerful and gives believers the
supernatural ability to love as Christ does instead of serving self. The battle
for Christians is to allow the Spirit to lead instead of shutting Him down to
go our own way. Our own way always leads to sin and then to destruction. Paul
provides a list of sinful lifestyles. Those who live in that way without ever
turning back should not think that they are in Christ. They will not inherit
God's kingdom along with those who have God's Spirit (Galatians 5:16–21).
Then
Paul offers a second list. This one reveals what comes out of those who allow
God's Spirit to lead the way. It is one "fruit" with nine
characteristics: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
gentleness, and self-control.
Galatians
3—4 focused on theology. Galatians 5—6 focus on how Christians should live in
response to those truths. In short, we must resist being dragged away from the
freedom we have in Christ to follow the law. We must also resist wasting our
freedom on serving our sinful desires instead of serving others in love. We can
do this by the power of God's Spirit with us. When we give Him the lead,
powerful, positive characteristics show up in us. Galatians 6 will show how to
use those characteristics to serve each other.
Galatians
5:13-15
For
you were called to be free, brothers and sisters; only don’t use this freedom
as an opportunity for the flesh, but serve one another through
love. For the whole law is fulfilled in one statement: Love your neighbor as
yourself. But if you bite and devour one another, watch out, or you will be
consumed by one another.
How
would you describe to someone the freedom we’re given in Christ?
What
were we freed from?
- Christ died to set us free from sin, the law, and our own selfish desires. We are not free to do whatever we want because that would lead us back into slavery to our selfish desires.
- Thanks to Christ – we are now able to do what was impossible before – to live unselfishly. When we use our freedom to live our own way or indulge in our own desires we are falling back into sin. It’s Paul’s whole message of dying
How
does Paul say the whole law is fulfilled?
- If we love our neighbor as our self. Love for others and for God is the response of those whom God has forgiven. In Luke 7:47 – Jesus said that those who are forgiven much, love much.
- Paul distinguishes here between the freedom to sin and the freedom to serve. It is an ongoing battle – to serve self or others. Freedom to sin is no freedom at all because it enslaves you to Satan, others, or your own sinful nature. As Christians we are free to do right and to glorify God through loving service to others.
- When we are not motivated by love, we become critical of others. We stop looking for good in them and see only their faults. Have you talked behind someone’s back? Have you focused on other’s shortcomings instead of their strengths? Jesus commanded you to love others as you love yourself (Matthew 22:39). When you begin to feel critical of someone, make a list of their positive qualities. It’s better to confront them in love than to gossip.
How
Serving in the Church Changed My Life
After
several years of neglecting my relationship with Jesus, I knew it was time to
go back to church. I searched online for a church nearby and found NewSpring. I
started listening to services online and eventually attended in person.
Week
in and week out, my family and I had an incredible experience. Parking
attendants directed me to a spot, and warm, smiling faces greeted us as we
approached the building. Volunteers helped check in the kids and guided us in
the right direction. We grabbed free coffee then went into the auditorium where
creative videos, and practical teaching kept us engaged and informed.
A
talented team of musicians led us in worship. One of the teaching pastors then
took the stage and delivered an inspiring message. After service, we were
always invited to connect with volunteers in the VIP Room or pray with someone
in the Care Room.
At
first glance, it’s easy to believe you are not needed in a church like this.
When every environment is welcoming and every volunteer seems eager to serve,
it’s easy to think, they’ve got it covered without my help.
A year
later, my family relocated, and it was no coincidence, NewSpring had a growing
portable campus about 12 miles from our house. My initial experience was the
same. But this time, I felt God leading me to start serving.
It
took a few months to find the right spot, but God was faithful to lead me where
I needed to be. Through serving on the Care Team, I discovered that serving was
about so much more than filling a need. God uses our serving to change us.
Four
Ways Serving in the Church Changed Me and Can Change You
1.
Serving directly increases our faith.
Through
serving, God gave me a front row seat to seeing Him change people’s lives.
Serving allows us to
experience His power firsthand ...
Watching
God work in someone else’s life increases our faith. In John 2:1-11, Jesus
performs His first miracle at a wedding in Cana by turning the water into wine.
Other than Mary, Jesus’ mother, only the servers at the wedding witnessed this
miracle. The wedding attendees received the benefit of the new wine, and the
wedding party saved face because of the miracle, but it was the servers who had
the first opportunity to witness Jesus’ power. Serving allows us to experience
His power firsthand and that naturally produces faith in us.
2.
Serving helps us see and experience what we’re made for.
Through
serving, I have learned that my fullest joy comes from serving others.
Ephesians 2:10 tells us why: “... we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ
Jesus to do good works, which God has prepared in advance for us to do.”
You
have been gifted by God, and you are incredibly valuable to Him and the church.
Ephesians 4 goes on to explain how important each individual is to the church.
Instead of trying to look, speak, and act the same, we are called to train each
other up using the gifts, skills, and abilities God has given us. When we do,
we’ll find “we’re all moving rhythmically and easily with each other, efficient
and graceful in response to God’s Son, fully mature adults, fully developed
within and without, fully alive like Christ” (Ephesians 4:7-13, MSG).
You have been gifted
by God, and you are incredibly valuable to Him and the church.
God
also uses our serving, and those we serve with, to reveal our gifts to us. 1
Peter 4:10 says, “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to
serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” When
we are operating in our gifting to serve God and others, we experience the kind
of joy we were made for!
3.
Serving draws us into authentic community.
If I
had to choose one word to describe how serving has affected my life, it would
be “community.” Not long after volunteering, I was invited to a group with a
couple on my serving team. Four years later, I consider them family. God has
used the people I serve with to encourage me, pray for me, and teach me. My
relationship with Jesus and others has flourished as a result.
In
John 17, Jesus prayed for God to protect us so we would be one as He and the
Father are one. This oneness is best experienced in and through participation
in the church — by serving and loving one another well.
4.
Serving requires obedience and redirects our focus to Jesus.
The
simplest way to follow Jesus is by doing what He did. In Matthew 20:28, Jesus
tells us He came to serve, not be served. By being obedient to follow Jesus in
this way, we get to know Him on a new level because we experience firsthand His
love for others.
When we begin to care
for and serve others, God redirects our focus.
When
we begin to care for and serve others, God redirects our focus. As my friend,
Chip, says “I can’t think of a better way to diminish the significance of my
problems than to get the focus off of myself and to place it on others.”
Believing
the lie that the church doesn’t need you will rob you of the joys God designed
for you to experience through serving. Take a risk and get involved. God will
honor that step of faith and grow it into so much more!
According
to these verses, what impact should our freedom in Christ have on our
relationships?
A call
to love.
- He urged them to serve one another in love. He reminded them that the whole law can be summed up in a single command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Love is shown in actions, not just words. It requires us to focus on others rather than ourselves.
- Church members often complain that their needs aren’t being met. I must say that, as a pastor, such talk rubs me the wrong way. Did not our Lord call us to serve one another? Didn’t He command us to deny ourselves? Unfortunately, these seem to be foreign concepts in the modern American church.
- He warned them against “biting and devouring” each other. Conflict can literally destroy a church, hence Paul’s warning that they not “consume” one another. Church conflict dishonors God, and it is a poor witness to others.
Galatians
6:1-5
Brothers
and sisters, if someone is overtaken in any wrongdoing, you who are spiritual,
restore such a person with a gentle spirit, watching out for yourselves so that
you also won’t be tempted. Carry one another’s burdens;
in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. For if anyone considers himself
to be something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Let each person
examine his own work, and then he can take pride in himself alone, and not
compare himself with someone else. For each person will have to carry his own
load.
Galatians
6 starts with describing how Spirit-led Christians serve each other by
restoring those caught be sin and bearing each other's burdens.
First
Paul called us to love and to show that love by serving others and not ourselves.
Then here he calls us to compassion – compassion for who?
Galatians
6 expands on Paul's teaching about living in God's Spirit, which he gave at the
end of Galatians chapter 5. It describes how Christians who live in God's
Spirit should use His power to treat each other.
To
begin with, Paul shows that when a brother or sister in Christ gets caught by
sin, other Christians should step in instead of looking away. Spiritually
mature Christians should help to restore the one caught by sin with gentleness
and humility. This is one of the ways those in Christ can help to carry each
other's burdens. When the load one of us is hauling around becomes too heavy,
others should step in to help that person get through that season. In other
words, life in Christ by the power of God's Spirit is not meant to be lived
alone (Galatians 6:1–2).
Having
said that, Paul encourages Christians to take careful stock of the work they do
in the Spirit without comparing themselves to each other. We should be honest
with ourselves and take full responsibility to do what is ours to do in
following Christ. One of those responsibilities is to share the good things God
gives to us with those who teach us the Word (Galatians 6:3–5).
A call
to compassion.
- We must show compassion to people who fall into sin.
- They were to do so in a spirit of “meekness” (gentleness). But for the grace of God, the offender could be you. Spiritual pride is the worst kind of pride. One of the worst things a Christian can say is, “That’ll never happen to me.” When you start thinking that way, chances are the devil has you right where he wants you.
Serving
others means helping to carry their burdens.
- As believers, we are to make every effort to restore a brother or sister who is guilty of a wrongdoing.
- Believers show the love of Christ by helping another person to bear life’s burdens that are too heavy to endure alone.
Galatians
6:10
Therefore,
as we have opportunity, let us work for the good of all, especially for those
who belong to the household of faith.
A call
to serve.
We are
to show kindness to all people. Kindness is a powerful witness. It demonstrates
the love of Christ. It’s a powerful weapon (Romans 12:20). It transcends all
racial, cultural, and social barriers.
We
should especially show kindness to our brothers and sisters in Christ. We
should be kind even to those who do not deserve it. Even unbelievers love those
who love them (Matt. 5:46). This does not mean we should let people abuse our
generosity (2 Thessalonians 3:10-12). Such love demonstrates that we belong to
Christ (John 13:35).
Seize
every opportunity to serve.
- Believers are to search out and seize every opportunity to do good toward others.
What
do you believe are the Benefits of Serving Others?
1. Refocus
Your Mind. Serving others forces you to take your focus off of
yourself. At the end of the day, we’re all in the same boat, normally focused
mostly on ourselves. That’s why this practice has such tremendous spiritual
benefits. The more you take your eyes off of yourself, the more you’ll see
others and the more you’ll see God all around you.
2. Practice
What You Read. The Bible is packed with spiritual insights,
life principles, and wisdom of tremendous value. It’s powerful, unprecedented,
and life-changing. You can read the same passage time after time over the
course of a lifetime and still find valuable insights you’ve never understood
before. There is a secret, however, that will unlock the deepest meaning of
some of the hardest passages for you. It all boils down to three words: Just do
it. Or as James reminds us, “Be doers of the Word, and not hearers only…”
Studying the Bible is awesome. Doing what you read is better. It allows the
Spirit to open your understanding like nothing else can.
3. Join
the Lord in His Work. When you serve others, you’re joining the
Lord in the work He’s already doing. He’s always working all around you. When
you ask God, “what can I do?”, He says, “Follow me. I’m already doing it.”
Sometimes you just have to open your eyes, direct them away from your life and
you’ll see countless opportunities to be a blessing to your neighbors. You
don’t have to be a career pastor or minister. You can join the Lord in His work
today!
4. God
Will Change Your Heart. There is no doubt about it. The moment you
step out to serve and help others, God will change your heart. You may feel
like you’re going to be a blessing to someone else, and you will be. But you’ll
also often feel like you may be the one receiving the bigger blessing. God’s
always working all around you, but He’s also keenly interested in what’s going
on inside you.
5. Have
Eternal Significance. When you serve others from a heart that loves
God and wants to follow Him, it reverberates in Eternity. That’s not hyperbole
or exaggeration just to sound cool, either. It’s Scriptural. Whatever you do,
do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from
the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ
whom you serve. Colossians 3:23-24 (See
also Matthew 6:1-6)
